Quite old Northumbria Squash players play squash and win

A report by Bobby Backhand

Hey y’all. I just wanted to let you know I was at Redcar on Saturday the 14th of October watching our local boys in the Stage 1 O-55’s County match.
There were 3 teams, Yorkashire, Durham and Clevelandham, and us.
Yorkashire played Durham and Clevelandham 1st in the morning match, and took a surprise victory 4-1. That’s enough about that match.
Our squad was Bryan Beeston, Jonathon Evans, Paul Millingston, Ward Glen, Ron Freebird and Adrian Aldertime. I know them all as good friends personally, including Adrian who I met for the 1st time on Saturday.

1st match vs Yorkashire.
Playing in the 5-3-1-4-2 order, Ward and Adrian were on 1st.
Ward’s brand of frankly crap squash quickly dispatched his opponent 3-0, who later said he’d felt ‘squash abused’.
Adrian was having a tougher battle on the other court, but his knee bandages managed to hold him together and he ran out a 3-1 winner. The smell of Hexham Leg Numbing Cream filled the room.
Next on were the No. 1’s. Bryan wasn’t feeling well. Not only had he just returned from South Africa playing in the Low Fell Open, he’d had a bout of food poisoning for the previous 2 days. But he said he would give it a go, and came through a tough match 3-2. A great effort from a very hungry Bryan.
Ronnie was next up, and won a hard fought 1st game 15/12. However his opponent argued back, taking the next 3 games and the match 3-1. A distraught Ronnie combed his hair (singular), and shed a few tears on his Blue Peter Badge (yes he has actually got one!).
Jonathon Evans then top spinned his way to victory with a comfortable 3-0 against a very tricky opponent – who now had twisted veins.
Match to Northumbria 4-1!

2nd match vs Durham and Clevelandham
Again Ward and Adrian were on 1st.
Ward’s not real squash shots were back after a quick lunch, and he went 2-0 up against crafty old fox Brian Duke. However on the last point, a particularly well- hit mishit by Ward sent Duke the wrong way, he fell and hurt his ankle. Game over – Ward wins.
Once again Adrian was having a battle on the other court, but this time his knee bandages couldn’t save him, losing 3-2 in a monster match. A great effort though by Adrian who had played twice on the same day for the 1st time for 64 yrs.
Bryan was in full prima donna mode by now and decided he would ‘rest’ and be served tea and biscuits by his admirers, and so Jonathon moved to No. 1.
Playing against a very tricky Neil Harrison and despite a niggling calf injury, Jon’s 36th injury that week, he put in an awesome performance and ran out a comfortable 3-0 winner.
Millo took the court next against ‘Eye of the Tizer’ Colin Shields. Tizer took the 1st game 15-12 but once the oil got into Millo’s joints it was game over, as he ran out a comfortable 3-1 winner. The Tizer had been emptied.
Ronnie then brought the match home in style with a convincing 3-0 win – and thankfully for our long journey home – the Birdman had finally landed.
Match to Northumbria 4-1!

And so the old boys won the league quite easily and progress to Stage 2 in January. I’ll be there supporting them, in fact I might even dust off my old Yellow Dot bat and Oliver tracksuit and play myself!

Laters, Bobby.